|The face of a man married to a Playboy Bunny.|
The inspiration for this post comes from the hilarious blog Down Goes Brown.
On June 22, 2010, the Florida Panthers traded forwards Nathan Horton and Gregory Campbell to the Boston Bruins for defenseman Dennis Wideman, the 15th overall pick in the 2010 draft, and a third-rounder in 2011. Tomas Kaberle brought some of DGB's spies over with him from Toronto, and they were able to attain a transcript of a call between Florida GM Dale Tallon and Boston GM Peter Chiarelli.
Dale Tallon: Hey Pete, it's Dale. How's it going?
Peter Chiarelli: Dale? Dale who?
Tallon: Dale Tallon, Pete.
Chiarelli: Oh, right. So is my dry cleaning ready?
Tallon: What? Peter, I'm the GM of the Florida Panthers.
Chiarelli: Haha sure Dale, whatever you say. What's on your mind?
Tallon: Well, I've got a disgruntled former 30 goal scorer I'm trying to get something for. His name's Nathan Horton. Any interest? His wife's a Playboy bunny...
Chiarelli: Sure, Dale. I've been looking all over for a scorer, as in a hockey scorer. Good thing you reminded me your team existed.
Tallon: Great. I'm not looking for too much. I'd like a good puck-moving NHL defenseman, preferably one who doesn't get viciously booed by the home fans, and maybe a few picks.
Chiarelli: How about Dennis Wideman? He was a +32 and had 50 points once you know. Could really turn your offense around.
Tallon: Oh yeah, I remember him. He was really good. How was he this season? I didn't watch much after getting fired by the Hawks after that whole not-tendering-RFAs-contract-offers thing.
Chiarelli: Pretty much the same, no major downturn. I'll face some heat for trading him because he's so beloved here, but I really want to give you a fair deal.
|Be nice to me, or my Dad will fire you!|
Chiarelli: I'm sure I could find a spot for him somewhere.
Tallon: Now, about picks. We'd like your first-rounder in this year's draft, and maybe a later one next year, say third round?
Chiarelli: You mean the fifteenth overall pick this year?
Tallon: Uh, duh Peter, what else would I be talking about?
Chiarelli: No idea, Dale. Everything seems fair to me. Horton and Campbell for Wideman, 15th overall this year, and a third-rounder next year.
Tallon: Ok, sounds great. Hope I didn't swindle you too blindly, right? Well, I'll submit the trade to the league office and it'll be set.
Chiarelli: I think it's best I handle that.
Tallon: Probably so, Peter. Great doing business with you, good luck finding a spot for Campbell and getting anything out of Horton.
Chiarelli: Thanks, enjoy Wideman. He's a menace in his own zone. Absolutely horrifying.
Tallon: Well, I'm sure he will scare some opposing forwards. Talk to you soon.
Chiarelli: Bye, Daniel.
|Admit it, you still have nightmares about this guy.|